Is My Head in the Milky-White Clouds?

As Grace grows older, I become more paranoid about having enough of a milk supply to breastfeed our adopted baby (whenever that blessed event happens). I am second-guessing our timing, but truthfully I didn't want Grace to be younger than this when she becomes a big sister. I was just reading an online post about adoptive moms and building up supply. Am I crazy to think that I can do this without buying supplements from Canada or Asia and pumping round the clock for months before? I think I've bucked the nursing trend already because I do not own a pump and have managed to breastfeed three babies/toddlers long-term without needing bottles. If I can do that, then can I do this? I know that it will take a little while to build from the supply necessary for a two year old to what's needed for a newborn. Since the baby will be formula fed for its first five days, I figured that I would continue to supplement that way until my supply built up. I've begun to wonder if I shouldn't go out and get a pump to have a frozen stash of milk to put in those bottles. The thing is that even though we've been working towards this for years and seriously going through the steps since June, it doesn't feel real yet. I fantasize about picking up a baby at the agency's office, but it still doesn't feel like something that will happen. Pumping from now on kind of feels like a jinx. I certainly don't want to look back to this time when I could have been doing something and regret my choices...I guess I'll be doing some comparison shopping for pumps. The few times I ever used one with my first baby (for like a month before I realized that I had no need for it), I didn't get much milk at all, even though I had an ample supply.

How did wet nurses do it anyway? I've read that they made sure to have the baby drain each breast completely, but I don't fully understand that. If my kids kept nursing after I was "empty" my breasts simply filled up again. Regardless, wet nurses in the past did not have access to hospital-grade double pumps.

Perhaps I'll buy a scale to weigh the baby before and after feedings to make sure he or she is getting enough. I guess I was wrong about not needing to buy any new things for the baby!